The Blues.
I love them as a music genre, but not so much as an emotion.
A case of the blues just feels like a heavy cloak around the shoulders, pressing down. No emotion is “bad”, but I sure don’t like wearing this one very long. How about you?
I am pretty self-aware and often try to figure out where the feeling is coming from. Sometimes I can pinpoint the circumstances in my life that I am thinking about and understand the source, but honestly there can be times when I am not exactly sure. We can always blame hormones when that happens, right? The truth is we can blame it on anything we want, but that doesn’t make it so.
During my latest case of the “the blues” I started thinking about a book I read several years ago, “Eating Problems for Breakfast” by Tim Hansel. One of Tim’s point is that problems are unavoidable, an almost necessary ingredient in life and should be accepted with thanksgiving because they help us grow.
Did I hear a loud, “What?!?” coming from your direction? Accepted with thanksgiving? I have to be kidding, right?
Now, that is a different view of them isn’t it?
If you are alive (and if you are reading this, there is a good chance you are) then both positive and negative circumstances WILL come into your life. There is no way around it, you just have to go through them.
Here’s the deal, though, problems are more problematic, depending on how we see them or what we think about them and they can be very beneficial.
An ongoing problem is like a tutor who walks beside you. We can learn so much from that tutor if we are willing to be teachable.
If you are like me, you may just want the problem to go away. Surely there is another, less painful way to learn. You want to break free from this tutor and run as far in the opposite direction that you can.
So, if we are going to have negative circumstances as our travel companion from time to time, will we fight against what is or allow them to be our guru?
If you have always viewed trials as something to avoid or from which to escape, the idea of learning from them might feel as overwhelming as the problem itself. Start by taking a step back and ask yourself what you are thinking about a particular situation. If feelings are the dominant issue, then name them. Once named, ask yourself what you were thinking when you felt a certain emotion. Become an observer of your thoughts. It might take some time if this is new for you.
The second piece is to simply acknowledge that you can learn something from the problem and begin to look for what you might learn about yourself, about life and how you interact with life.
Here’s the great thing…once you are being totally honest with yourself, you get to decide what you think about a situation and how you will inevitably feel. If you can see a problem as a teacher, you will be able to develop gratitude for the lessons learned.
This is a huge step in living Your One Beautiful Life!